I woke up two hours ago (it's now 3:30 AM)...I woke up as a fire started in my chest and all my body heat exited through my pores...Heat. Heat. God, I'm gonna incinerate right here and now. Spontaneous Combustion. I got out of bed and sat on my recliner and held a fan right on my lap aimed at my face to blow some of that rising heat away from me. Finally. I was comfortable...until...OMG, the other end of the spectrum comes...As my temp climbs from 95 to 99, I'm wracked with chills. Can't get warm enough...back to bed, kicking the cat off, accidentally as I scramble for the blankets...Good ...comfort again....For a whole two minutes then a volcano goes off somewhere in my inside and the hot lava oozed from my pores once again. Sound miserable??
Add to that pain that wracks every single joint in my body...hands, wrists and ankles swollen like balloons with this disease and oh , do they ever hurt.
Sleep is no longer an option. Thank God for my iPod...it keeps me company by its accompaniment to my isolation. Desperado by the Eagles is on, reminding me that I'm getting no younger and that my prison is walking through this world all alone. Yep. Got that right. But Anthony Evans comes on to assure me that even though I feel alone, even though my strength is gone, even if my faith is lost...Trust in Him now, and do not give up.
I am planning on working on a painting today...it's one I really want to finish before my left arm is totally unable to grip a stylus or is too painful to move around to draw...However I'm also supposed to cook dinner for the staff of our youth outreach at my church today. Many of them come straight from work with no chance to grab dinner, so some of us volunteer and cook for them each Thursday. This only matters in that I think I need to go to the grocery store for an ingredient in my planned meal....and while I"m there should supplant my empty shelves with some food. And because of the store and the cooking---there may be no time for painting. I really should get out of bed and begin the painting now...except that my body KNOWS it's only a quarter to four and is saying "Leave me the freak alone...I just wish I were asleep."
So maybe I'll listen to my body and try one more time to catch some rest before day dawns...If my body temp would only regulate then I could maybe sleep. Here goes nothing.